Destined for What?
by Wolf Master Loki
Summary: What if Bernard had gone to school with a young Megamind? How would his life have differed? A re-telling of the story with original additions. Major AU. Megamind/Bernard. Minion/Roxanne.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Megamind. I make no money from this story.

Warnings: Violence, Swearing, Humor, AU, Eventual Smut

Chapter 1

It was another new day at the Lil' Gifted School for Lil' Gifted Kids. Even though the gifted kids part of the name was debatable. Some of these kids were only gifted at picking their own noses. However, being gifted definitely applied to one particular student. This student was incredibly intelligent and also incredibly odd looking. He had an overly large head and blue skin that clashed with the orange jumpsuit he was forced to wear. Living at a prison didn't allow for good fashion sense.

Class was set to start and the teacher had just walked in. The children were already seated in the hard plastic chairs waiting for her. "Listen up. We have a new student joining us today."

Blue, the aforementioned odd kid, actually looked up and paid attention. Usually he didn't bother since there was nothing they could teach him here that he couldn't learn on his own. The new child standing next to the teacher looked like he'd rather be anywhere else. He had the awkward look of a nerd complete with messy brown hair and thick glasses with large frames.

"Would you like to introduce yourself?" the teacher asked him.

"No. Not really," the kid replied in a tone that perfectly matched his uncaring expression. The teacher crossed her arms and stared hard at the young boy until he gave a resigned sigh. "I'm Bernard."

The teacher quickly realized that she wasn't going to get anything else from him so she didn't press further. "Take a seat Bernard."

Bernard quickly surveyed the available seats. There was only enough chairs to allow one for each student. The only empty seat was between Blue and the rest of the students. No one else wanted to sit right next to the odd kid. Bernard sat in the available chair and barely glanced at Blue. That was unusual but the alien boy was kind of glad that at least one person didn't find it necessary to stare at him like he was a science experiment.

The teacher began the morning lessons which consisted of basic math and grammar. Blue quickly lost interest and looked back down. He absentmindedly stared at Minion, his fish companion, that he kept in a glass ball of water. Minion smiled at his master revealing rows of sharp teeth and a prominent underbite. Blue gave a small smile back before getting lost in his thoughts.

Bernard was equally as bored. He already understood the concepts being taught. Glancing over he noticed the unusually colored kid next to him wasn't paying attention either. He decided that this kid was worth getting to know. Bernard wasn't someone that judged on looks since he was familiar with having it done to him. Though, being intelligent was something he respected.

The teacher concluded her lesson. "It's recess time. So class go ahead and play." All of the children got up and ran outside noisily. Blue followed at a more sedate pace after setting Minion down on a nearby table. The teacher grabbed Bernard before he could get far. "Take this time to get to know some other kids."

Bernard didn't answer and simply followed the other kids out the door into the play area outside. Blue had already settled himself in a corner of the yard. Luckily for him no one was interested in playing with him today. Those times never ended well. He continued his deep thoughts on a new invention when he noticed someone walk up to him and sit down. Looking over he saw that it was the new kid.

"You probably don't want to sit with me," Blue warned the other child. He was well aware how horrible the kids would treat this new boy if they continued socializing.

"Will I turn blue?" Bernard asked in the same bored tone he'd used earlier.

Blue couldn't tell if Bernard was being serious or not. Perhaps he was incapable of feeling emotion. Blue had heard of something like that in the prison. "No. I'm this way because I'm an alien."

"Weird."

That was a familiar insult. Coming from Bernard though, it didn't sound like an insult. His tone which was probably odd to others actually made Blue feel more at ease. As if he was as normal as anyone else. "They'll make fun of you. The other kids don't like me very much. No one does." The young alien wasn't used to opening up this way but it did feel good to share with someone other than Minion. Bernard was already in deep just sitting with him this long anyway.

"That's nothing new," Bernard said. "They made fun of me at my old school too. That's why my mother sent me here. Different place, same insults. Besides, we're freaks and freaks should stick together. It's how it works you know. Normal kids all group together and weirdos group together away from them."

Blue considered the other's words. Freaks stick together. Well he was considered weird and so was Minion. They stuck together. So it stood to reason that if Bernard was weird than he should join them. Maybe someday there would be enough weird people going to school to outnumber the others. Blue though that would be great.

"Ok. We'll stick together."

At the end of the school day when Blue was being taken back to his cell he had an extra spring in his step. Minion was held firmly in his hands as always. If the fish could walk he would also have a bounce in his step. His master was happy and that made Minion happy as well. They had made a friend. The dour child was a little off-putting but he made Blue happy and that's all that mattered to Minion.

Blue sat on the floor of his cell working on a new project. He was inspired by his good mood and was working on a new way to harness the power contained in his binky. Minion watched his master drawing out his plans from his place on the floor. The fish could make out that this new invention was definitely gun shaped.

"Be careful, Sir. If you break down another wall the Warden will be mad," Minion warned.

"Don't worry Minion it won't knock down a wall. Well I don't think it will. We'll find out when I finish."

Minion sighed but dropped the subject for the moment. There was no deterring Blue when he was focused on a project. The fish settled down in his ball to sleep leaving his master to plan.

* * *

Blue and Bernard had gotten closer as time went on. As Blue had predicted his new friend was shunned just as bad as he was. He made sure to keep an eye out. Since Minion always looked out for him it seemed fitting that he would look out for Bernard. It made him feel good to have someone to watch out for.

At that moment the class was learning a children's song with the teacher and Wayne Scott, or Metro Boy, leading them. Bernard had decided to join Blue in the back away from the others. No one bothered to get their attention as it was easier just to let them do their own thing.

"You know for a gifted school these kids don't seem that gifted to me," Bernard observed while staring at the rest of the class. It was easy for him to get along with Blue since the other boy was very intelligent. He found the classes and other activities juvenile and beneath him.

Blue laughed, "I know what you mean." He pulled something out of his pocket. "I've made something new. Watch this." Using Minion as a target, he pointed the gun with his binky attached and fired. The fish had just enough time to look panicked before he, and his glass ball, shrunk into a blue cube.

Bernard leaned forward and adjusted his glasses as he took in the small blue cube. Blue recognized the gesture as interest and smiled broadly. He enjoyed impressing Bernard with his inventions.

"What is it?"

"I call it a dehydration gun. All you do is add water and it turns back to normal." Blue poured a drop of water on the cube and it instantly turned back into Minion. The fish was a little disoriented but quickly shook it off.

"Weird."

* * *

School had been going very well for Blue. He had managed to not blow up or set anything on fire in three weeks. A personal record for him. He didn't feel so alone with Bernard as a friend. Though Minion would always be his best friend. The Warden was glad that his youngest charge was staying out of trouble and had high hopes that the boy could be rehabilitated. Unfortunately, like all good things this would have to end someday.

The end would start off like any normal day with no warning as to the chain of events that would come. Blue was off to the side of the play yard. He was tinkering with his dehydration gun in an attempt to make it more powerful to be applied to bigger objects. While focusing on his invention, he was also looking out for Bernard. Being able to focus on several things at once did come in handy. Right now his friend was over by the fence watching the cars go by.

The teacher never bothered to defend Blue when things got rough. However, she did have more compassion for Bernard. So even though he was friends with Blue, the kids didn't torture him the same way. When another kid approached Bernard, Blue didn't think anything of it at first. Until he noticed the telltale signs of aggression. They were arguing. Well the boy, Timmy, was arguing. Bernard had the same nonchalant attitude he always had before turning away and ignoring the boy.

Timmy obviously didn't like being ignored and grabbed Bernard by the shirt. He swung his fist back and punched him right in the face. Bernard let out a startled yell. Blue saw the fist connect and heard a sharp crack as Bernard's glasses broke. Blue was on his feet and running before he realized it. He raised his dehydration gun and fired. Timmy turned into a glowing blue cube and fell to the ground.

None of the other children had ever seen this invention before. They were never that interested. So when Blue shot the other boy they all assumed the worse. The children started yelling and a couple burst into tears.

"He killed him!" a girl shouted.

"No I didn't. He's fine," Blue protested. He didn't get to fight his case passed that since Wayne had decided to intervene. The super-powered boy punched his rival in the stomach knocking him back a couple feet. Blue was lucky to have a tougher body than a human. Instead of having broken ribs he was only winded. His gun had fallen from his grasp after the fall. Bernard, who was pinching his bleeding nose, quickly snatched it up and hid it in his pants.

Blue turned his head and spit on the glowing cube. He didn't care enough about the boy contained in it to go get some water for him. The cube expanded and Timmy was sitting in its' spot stunned into silence.

"What happened here?" The teacher yelled as she made her way from the schoolhouse. All the kids started yelling trying to tell their own version of the story. "Quiet down!" she yelled. Everyone stopped talking. The teacher pointed to Blue and said, "You. It's always you that's causing trouble. I'm calling that prison and you are not coming back."

"But-," Blue started speaking.

"No. Go inside and wait until they come to get you." The teacher pointed to the schoolhouse behind her. Blue already knew he was supposed to go to his corner. He hung his head and walked inside. Bernard followed him quickly. The teacher didn't bother stopping him.

Blue went into his corner and sat down. Bernard went to clean himself off. After a couple minutes, Minion was settled on Blue's lap. Bernard had brought the fish over and sat down. Blue smiled a bit at the sight of wads of tissue stuffed up the other boy's nose. The smiled dropped off his face when he remembered why his friend was hurt in the first place.

"Are you going to be okay?"

"Sure," Bernard said. "That kid hits like a girl."

Blue laughed a little. "I'm going to miss you," he said in a somber tone.

"Maybe they'll let you stay."

"No. I won't be allowed to come back. It's okay though because I realized something."

"What's that?" Bernard asked.

"I'm always going to be bad. There's no point in coming here and pretending that I can be anything else." Blue turned to Bernard with a resolved look. "It's my destiny. I see that now. And if I'm going to be bad then I'm going to be the baddest bad there ever was."

Bernard wasn't sure what to say to that. How do you argue with someone that firmly believes they're no good? In a rare display of spontaneity he hugged the alien boy tightly. Blue hesitated for a few seconds before returning the hug. It was a new but not wholly unpleasant experience. In that moment, he decided to share something with Bernard

"My name is Kismet."

Bernard broke away from their embrace and asked, "What?"

"My name...It's Kismet. So when we see each other again. You can call me by name." Blue said shyly.

"Weird."

Blue finally gave out a real laugh. He was cut short when someone yelled his name. "Blue!"

Turning around he saw that the Warden had come in person with his two usual escorts. He must have been in more trouble than he thought. Blue hung his head before trudging up to the guards. They shackled his arms before taking him outside. Bernard watched sadly from his place on the floor as his friend was dragged away.

Blue waited until long after lights out to let himself cry. He couldn't allow anyone to actually see him this vulnerable. It was still a prison after all, regardless of his age. He hugged Minion close to his chest as he sobbed. Minion was pushed as close as possible to the glass that separated them. He wished more than anything in that moment that he could protect his master from the pain inside.

Bernard was sitting on his bed at home. He was already being transferred back to his old school. Even though they beat him up there too. At least those bullies were familiar. He sniffled a little. Silent tears were running down his face. One of his only friends got taken to jail. If anything deserved a good cry then this situation qualified.

In his lap was an old lunch box. The metal, square kind that no one really used anymore. It was a small treasure box that contained a couple comics, an arrowhead, and other assorted things that young kids enjoyed. Bernard gently placed the dehydration gun within the box and locked it inside. He hid the box under his bed.

He would definitely see Kismet again. After all, his friend had to come collect his gun.


	2. Chapter 2

This chapter consists of a few shorter stories that will fill in the time between the events of the movie and the time in the last chapter. Enjoy.

Chapter 2

It was two months before Bernard heard from his alien friend again. One day he received a letter, something that had never happened before. It was obvious after he opened it who it was from. Only Kismet would send him a letter in childish scrawl but filled with huge adult words. After that first time, they exchanged letters and packages frequently over the years.

Bernard eventually amassed a large collection of schematics and small pieces of technology that were sent to him. He had even received a stun gun discreetly concealed as a watch. It had come in handy many times. Bullies were a problem he never grew out of. It was almost a decade later before he got the chance to see Kismet in person.

Currently, Bernard was sitting with his lanky frame hunched over the desk in his room. He was still gangly and had glasses like he did when he was a kid. Although the glasses were not as large now. As he worked, he heard a light tapping at his window. At first he assumed it was a branch but it was too rhythmic to be just coincidence. Bernard turned and stared at the window.

The teen checked his wrist to make sure he had his watch before slowly heading to the window. He pulled the blinds and slid the window pane up. A streak of blue entered his vision and let out an excited, "Hey!"

Bernard stumbled back in surprise. He landed on his butt holding his wrist out towards the unknown figure. When he finally focused he realized that the figure was Kismet. His friend was smiling broadly through the open window. Bernard excitedly jumped up and reached through the window to grab the alien. After pulling him through the window he hugged the other teen tightly.

Kismet hesitated for a moment before returning the hug lightly. He hadn't had a hug since the last time he'd seen Bernard and it felt just as weird as it did back then. Bernard let go and quickly composed himself. He was a little embarrassed at letting himself get so excited. After getting settled down he realized a very important thing. Kismet was supposed to still be in jail and he was in fact still wearing the orange prisoner uniform.

"What are you doing here?"

"Is that anyway to greet an old friend?" Kismet answered. His tone was light but his face showed some hesitance. Maybe Bernard didn't want him there.

"I'm glad to see you." Kismet immediately perked up. "It's just that I figured the next time I saw you I wouldn't be an accessory to a felony."

"Oh don't worry so much. No one will know that I was here." Bernard wasn't ready to believe that. Who didn't notice a blue-skinned man with an orange jumpsuit on running around at night? Of course just at that moment a large thump sounded on the side of the house.

"Yea. No one will notice," Bernard said sarcastically. Minion suddenly zoomed in on a small mechanical body. A glass dome filled with water was situated on top. The little robot had pincer arms and oversized metal jaws.

"A pair of legs would have been nice, Sir." Minion shakily flew through the air before settling.

"Nonsense Minion. You have to learn to fly before you can walk."

"That's not how that saying goes."

"Sure it is."

"What is that?" Bernard interrupted before they could get into a heated debate. He didn't want two wanted felons in his house any longer than necessary. No matter how good of friends they were.

"It's a brain bot," Kismet said excitedly. "You remember those right?" He didn't give Bernard a chance to answer before continuing, "Well it's the mechanical body of one. I'm testing out this new technology that transmits thoughts into action. When I perfect it. I can build Minion a complete mechanical body that he can control."

Bernard quickly snatched Minion out of the air. The flying fish had started spinning erratically and was dangerously close to destroying his room. "I agree with Minion. Legs seem like a good idea."

"Your both spoil sports." Kismet sat down on the bed. "I just wanted to visit before I started my work."

"What work?" Bernard asked. He had a suspicion already since his friend only talked frequently about one thing.

"My villain work of course." Kismet jumped back up enthusiastically. "I have a lot to do. See I have a list." He pulled out a roll of paper from his pocket.

Bernard tucked Minion under one arm and grabbed the piece of paper. He read aloud, "Break out of prison, get an evil lair, make cool villain outfit, invent dangerous stuff, destroy the hero, take over the city, big villain party." After lowering his arm he said, "You're kidding right?"

Kismet looked offended. "No. I'm going to be the greatest villain Metrocity has ever seen."

"Did you just say Metrocity? You know what...Never mind." Bernard walked up to Kismet and laid his hands on the other teen's shoulders. He had to look down slightly since he was a bit taller. "Are you absolutely sure about this? Will this make you happy?"

"It's my destiny." Kismet answered automatically.

"But does it make you happy?"

Kismet considered his words before replying, "Yes. It makes me happy."

Bernard sighed heavily. He didn't quite believe his friend but he had to accept his choice. He wanted nothing more than to convince Kismet of his worth but it was a losing battle. "Fine. Just don't get blown up or anything stupid like that."

Kismet waved his hand in dismissal. "That would never happen."

"It's not polite to lie, Sir." Minion added.

"Who's side are you on?" Minion didn't answer and simply shrugged his fins.

The two aliens started to bicker between themselves. Bernard released Minion from his hold and headed to his bed. He decided to return Kismet's old gun since he wasn't sure when they'd see eachother again. It seemed an appropriate time. He dug under the bed for his old lunch box which hadn't been opened since the day he'd locked the gun away. He pulled the weapon out of the container and held it. It looked so small in his hands.

Kismet came up behind him and looked over his shoulder. "What's that?"

"It's your dehydration gun. I picked it up that day that kid punched me."

"I remember," Kismet said quietly. Bernard gently placed the gun in Kismet's hands. He sat down on the floor and Minion swung his body around to settle next to his master. Bernard watched in interest as he pulled the gun apart and pulled the glowing blue piece from it. He held it gently in his hands and said, "It's my binky. From home."

Bernard sat down on the floor to get a better look. He hadn't realized he'd had a genuine piece of alien technology in his room all this time. Kismet looked at the binky with watery eyes. Bernard hoped that the alien teen wouldn't start crying. He had no idea how to deal with that. Kismet suddenly grabbed his hands and placed the binky in them.

He said, "Keep it."

"I can't," Bernard protested. It seemed so important to Kismet a moment ago.

"I want you to have it. It'll keep you company while I'm gone."

Bernard was about to ask what that meant when Kismet grabbed his hands. He closed the human boy's hands over the binky. When the binky settled in his grasp a tingling sensation went through his body. It was very warm and engulfed his whole body. Bernard felt as if he'd never be alone again.

"What is that?"

"It's meant to be comforting." Kismet replied. "You'll never feel alone when you have this. Keep it safe."

Bernard nodded. "Of course."

"Now the next time you see me I'll be the overlord of Metrocity." Kismet stood up and headed towards the window. "I'll see you soon."

"Sure thing." Bernard watched as his friend snuck back out in the night. Minion swooped out after him and managed to only smack into two trees on the way. "Someday I'll invest in some normal friends."

* * *

Roxanne Ritchi was a new fresh faced intern at KMCP news. She figured when she got this opportunity that she'd be doing something semi-exciting like getting an upclose view of a robbery, driving the news van, or even filing paperwork. Anything other than fetching coffee. Which always seemed to be her job. Really anything that needed fetching was done by the new intern. Life at the bottom sucked.

Of course Roxanne wasn't going to take it lying down. She was working hard on getting an inside story that would boost her up the food chain. Metroman and Megamind were always hot news. Even though they were locked in battle every couple months it never got old for the general public. Roxanne considered it a never-ending soap opera. It was a cheap soap opera too.

With that in mind she had dredged up every contact she knew and employed all the journalism skills she could. She'd worn enough low-cut tops and short skirts to last her a lifetime. It was a sacrifice necessary to get a jumpstart. She could have dignity when she was in front of the camera. All her work had pulled up a man with an almost encyclopedic knowledge of Megamind and Metroman. Not to mention a vast collection of items from them.

An interview with a guy like this would be great for her. She'd get a boost in her job and he could get some exposure. Everyone wins. She knew that his name was Bernard Jones and he worked at a university library on the campus where he was studying. Roxanne had been staking out this library for a couple weeks. She wanted to catch this guy here where he couldn't avoid her. She'd get that interview if it killed her.

Roxanne's persistence was about to pay off. She noticed a man a few aisles away from where she was seated. He fit the description she was given. Brown hair. Brown eyes under round glasses. He had an expression that her contact had described as "Like someone gave him a basket of kittens then punched them all in the face. Then they took the kittens back." The description was more accurate than she thought it would be.

After taking a cleansing breath she approached the man shelving books. He didn't acknowledge her until she spoke his name.

"You're Bernard Jones."

"Yes. I am. You win the prize." Bernard replied. He didn't even look up from his books.

Roxanne cringed a little. His voice was so monotone she wondered briefly if he was drugged or if he always sounded that way. "I wanted to ask you some questions."

"No."

"No?" Roxanne said surprised.

"No." Bernard said again.

"Come on. I spent a lot of time tracking you down."

"Not my concern."

Roxanne let out an exasperated breath. This was looking hopeless but she wasn't ready to give up just yet. "I want to know everything you know about Megamind and Metroman."

Bernard paused for a moment before continuing his shelving again. "That could take a while. Why do you care anyway?"

"I need this story to get out of this bitch work I'm doing. There's gotta be something you want."

"Not likely."

"I'm sure KMCP will pay you good money if you're as knowledgeable as I've heard."

Bernard stopped working this time. He could always use money. This school was very expensive and he was scraping by with scholarships and this job. Besides most of what he knew was common knowledge if anyone bothered to pay as much attention as he did. "Fine. You give me a good price and I'll give you what you want to know."

Roxanne grinned in triumph. She would pull this off. "You got a deal." She held out her hand but Bernard just stared at it. Roxanne sigh and forcefully grabbed his hand before shaking it once. Finally, she could get some excitement in her life.

A week later Bernard could be found bribing Megamind and Minion with pastries to keep them from catching the special report he was responsible for on the news.

* * *

Evil Lair was only one of several hideouts that were used by Megamind. However, it was the biggest and served as his house for the most part. It was also where he made all of his inventions. Megamind and Minion were hanging out in the living area of the lair. Minion now sat atop a metal body in the form of a gorilla. The alien fish was sitting on the couch watching TV while Megamind tinkered with a new piece of technology nearby.

Megamind decided to take a quick break and get a drink. He glanced over at Minion to ask for one before noticing that his friend was watching TV intently. Some good natured teasing was in order. "Is it six already? We wouldn't want to miss the lovely Roxanne Ritchi, would we?"

Minion scowled at his master for a moment before turning back to the TV. "She's very informative and it's good honest news...And I suppose she's not that bad looking."

Megamind laughed loudly, "You have the biggest crush on her."

"That's not true." Minion protested. Of course the blush rising on his gills gave him away.

Megamind began making faces and loud kissing noise at the fish. Minion showed a rare display of aggression and tackled Megamind to the ground. They both fell to the ground wrestling. Megamind's new power cell was knocked off the table and crushed. A chair went flying and hit a nearby wall.

Minion had the upperhand since he was much stronger. Megamind was in a headlock as he groaned with the effort to get away. He was cursing in his head for giving Minion's body this much power. "This is Roxanne Ritchie reporting..." with those words Minion quickly let go and ran back to the couch. He situated himself to watch the reporter on TV.

Megamind sputtered on the ground where Minion left him. Roxanne was on the screen talking to Metroman. Suddenly Megamind sat up and looked wide eyed at the TV. "I have an idea." He said quietly.

Minion glanced worriedly at Megamind. "That doesn't sound good."

"Of course it's not good. It's evil. Deliciously evil." Megamind ran up to the TV and hugged it. "We'll kidnap this Roxanne Ritchi."

"What?" Minion yelled. "We can't do that."

"Of course we can. We're evil remember?"

Minion protested, "But why?"

"I've suspected for awhile that she's involved with Metroman. He only ever talks to her. We can use her as bait to trap him in an ingenious...trap." Megamind quickly considered an argument to sway Minion to his side. "Besides, if we kidnap her you'll get to see her a lot more."

"Oh Sir. That's so thoughtful of you." Minion pulled Megamind into a tight hug before they began plotting how to complete their first kidnapping.

* * *

This was only Roxanne's third time being kidnapped. Actually it was the first time she'd been kidnapped successfully. The first time Megamind had tried to take her she'd screamed. Metroman had shown up in less than a minute to rescue her. The second time they'd managed to gag her and get her into a car. That time she'd had to wait until the car slowed down before jumping out. This time they'd succeeded in taking her. They'd used some kind of spray that had knocked her out completely.

Now Roxanne was dangling above a tank of alligators with a rope around her torso. They were jumping and snapping at her. It was pretty terrifying and she didn't have much faith in the rope holding her up. He could have at lease used chains in her opinion.

Megamind was fiddling with a large piece of machinery. It was hooked up to several other smaller machines that were strategically placed around her position. He suddenly cursed and slammed his hands down on the control panel. Roxanne didn't like that. It seemed like a bad sign. Her suspicion was confirmed when one of the above machines shorted out and gave off a small explosion.

The explosion wasn't large enough to do any real damage. It was large enough to knock some burning debris towards Roxanne causing the rope that was holding her to catch fire. Roxanne looked up at the rapidly burning rope and back down to the snapping alligators. She screamed louder than she ever had in her whole life.

The rope snapped and she continued to scream while she fell. Then Roxanne landed on something solid and furry. She stopped screaming and opened her eyes to see that her savior had been Minion. He flashed her a large grin. One arm and both of his robotic ape feet were holding on to the side of the tank. He free arm was outstretched to catch her.

Minion pulled her close before swinging over the side of the tank onto ground. He quickly untied her and set her down. Roxanne was suspicious. She couldn't understand why Minion would bother saving her. Megamind was still cursing his machine and the sparking of various failing parts was getting more frequent.

Megamind suddenly said, "It's no use. This place is going to blow." He ran over to the tank and pulled a lever that released the alligators. The alien whistled and several brainbots came and picked up the animals before flying away. Minion scooped Roxanne up in his arms bridal style before following his master. They all got out with little trouble but the place was quickly becoming unstable. The machines were blowing up with greater frequency and strength.

All three people stood far from the building watching it start to crumble. Minion had set the reporter on the ground. Both him and Megamind were standing a little away from her. Megamind suddenly punched his friend in the shoulder. "You've ruined our evil image."

"I couldn't just leave her there Sir. You don't want to see her hurt either."

Megamind punched Minion again. "Don't say that out loud," he whispered. "Take her home. Quickly."

Minion nodded at the order. He approached Roxanne and quickly ducked in front of her. "I'm sorry Ms. Ritchi. Don't tell anyone about this, please."

Roxanne only had a moment to nod before the spray was in her face again. She wouldn't tell anyone how the two villains had saved her life. They repaid that silence by keeping her on solid ground. Never again was she afraid of either of them when she was kidnapped afterwards. Megamind still blamed Minion for that.


	3. Chapter 3

**Story:** Destined for What?  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Megamind or any of its' characters Warnings: Humor, AU, slight swearing, sexual innuendo Rating: PG-13 (Eventually R)  
**Story Summary:** What if Bernard went to school with Megamind when they were kids. How would that change the events that followed. Major events of the movie will happen.  
**Chapter Summary**: Filler chapter to bridge the gap between the story's beginning and the events of the movie.

**Note:** So this chapter was totally kicking my ass. That's why it took so long. Allow me to share a little background for a moment. Back in the day when I first started writing fanfiction I sucked. I would go into way to much description about nothing important. I've improved since then but I still feel like I have trouble balancing between description and dialogue. This chapter in particular was difficult to write so that everything flowed. I'm still not completely sure about this chapter but I was spending eternity on it. It was time to move on. Anyway, feel free to tell me if my writing gets bogged down by either too much pointless details or excessive dialogue. Now enough rambling from me. Read on.

**Chapter 3**

Roxanne knocked firmly on the apartment door in front of her. After a few moments the door swung open and was stopped short by a chain. The occupant glanced out and heaved a huge sigh. Roxanne rolled her eyes in response. The door closed so that the chain could be removed.

When the door swung out again, Bernard was standing there looking bored as always. Even though their initial meeting had been purely a business proposition. They'd maintained contact and these days were friends. She pushed passed the stuffy man in the doorway.

"Why do you always act like you don't know it's me?" Roxanne asked. "I have to call before I can come here."

"Calling is the polite thing to do." Bernard replied. He didn't want her to know that the real reason he insisted she call was because Megamind or Minion could be in his home at any given time. Since Roxanne was the only other person that visited him, he needed her to announce her arrival.

Roxanne gave an un-ladylike snort, "Because you know all about being polite."

"I'm the most polite person you know." Bernard moved around the kitchen getting some coffee for the both of them. He knew that she was addicted to coffee to keep her going during her hectic day. It was the best way to keep her happy.

"That's because I know mostly supervillains and reporters. So it's not very impressive of you." Roxanne sat down heavily on the couch in the living room while Bernard finished in the kitchen.

Bernard didn't bother replying to that. He set a cup of coffee in front of Roxanne and took a seat on the empty chair. "So what do you want?"

She ignored his abruptness since she was long since used to it. "Well I heard that you got offered a job at that new museum they've been building. So I came to congratulate you." Roxanne took a sip of her coffee. "That's what friends do you know."

"We're friends?" Bernard asked.

"Of course. You're my gay best friend." Roxanne smirked at him. She'd met the few people he'd managed to date. Both male and female.

"I'm not gay. I just don't judge people based on their gender. I prefer to judge people on how incredibly stupid they are."

Roxanne laughed. "Well you're the closest thing that I have."

"Fair enough." Bernard sipped at his own coffee. "I don't want to know how you even heard about that job since I just heard about it yesterday. Are you stalking me?"

"You wish."

"If I was going to wish for a stalker I'd pick someone more appealing than you." Bernard shot back.

Roxanne punched him in the arm. "You're a jerk." She said this with no real venom in her voice. She liked Bernard's company and rarely took his insults seriously. He treated her like anyone else which was nearly impossible to find in her life and her line of work. She admired that about him.

"They only offered me that job so I could inventory all the museum pieces. They don't know shit about Megamind or Metroman."

"Nobody knows as much about them as you do." Roxanne suddenly gestured at his apartment. "You know you could just charge admission to this place and it'd be pretty much the same." Bernard just shrugged. It was true that most of his living space was filled by various pieces of technology and mementos from battles. He had newspaper clippings from particular memorable moments on his walls. Shelves filled with pieces of dangerous weapons and other odds and ends were up against the walls.

"So what's on your mind. You didn't come here just to wish me good luck. Even if we're friends." He emphasized the friends portion to get a rise out of her.

Roxanne fiddled with her cup for a moment. Bernard was usually perceptive like this. He could often tell when something was bothering her or if she was holding something back. "I'm just feeling a little down and since you're such a ray of sunshine I figured a visit would cheer me up."

Bernard rolled his eyes in response. He was used to jokes about his stoic demeanor. "Well as your 'gay best friend' I'm obligated to listen. Please continue." He really didn't mind letting Roxanne vent. She was his only normal human friend after all. Not to mention she was a nice break from Megamind and Minion's exuberant antics.

"I totally struck out last night. I didn't even think that was possible for a woman in a bar. What's wrong with me?"

"The only reason you can't get a man is because everyone thinks you're trying to cheat on Metroman." Bernard smirked, "You slut."

"Pfft. If only I was a slut. That would imply I was getting some but no. I'm not. Totally unfair." Roxanne paused as she sipped her drink. "Even you're getting more action than me. Now that's sad." Bernard tried to look offended but failed miserably. Roxanne continued, "You know who I blame. Megamind and Metroman. Megamind for kidnapping me and Metroman for letting rumors about us circulate."

"Hm. Well we could get together. I'd make that sacrifice for you."

"Pass."

"Ouch." Bernard said with fake hurt. "Male prostitute?"

"I'll consider it." Roxanne paused. "Next."

"So you'd sleep with a prostitute but not me?"

"I'd rather sleep with Megamind than you."

"Well there you go. You could sleep with Megamind. Blame it on Stockholm Syndrome."

Roxanne grimaced. "I'd sleep with Minion before I would sleep with Megamind. At least he seems the more sane of the two."

"If you wanted to have sex with Minion all you had to do was say so from the start. I'm open-minded." Bernard almost laughed at Roxanne's look of outrage. He was having a lot of fun.

"You're a horrible human being." Roxanne said. Bernard just shrugged in response. "Since I'm sufficiently mortified now. I'll be leaving." Roxanne finished off her drink and stood up.

"Already. We were just getting to the good stuff."

"I have to get to a meeting in half an hour anyway." Roxanne felt much better now that she got some of her issues out in the open. Bernard was good for some verbal sparring any time.

Bernard waved at her. "Have fun."

"Because you'd know all about that too." Roxanne left his apartment with that parting statement.

Bernard checked the time. He'd already got in some good digs on Roxanne. He picked up his phone and began dialing. Time to make fun of Minion.

* * *

Megamind was standing in his usual planning area writing on various pieces of paper. Every few minutes he would hand off another paper to a brainbot. He already had half of his evil plot hanging from the strings on the ceiling. As he bent over another paper to write something he heard the heavy plodding steps of Minion's suit.

"Sir! Please do something about Mr. Jones. He is insufferably rude." Minion stopped just behind Megamind. He turned around to look at his companion.

Megamind was a bit surprised that Minion would insult anyone but Bernard had always been a special case. "Nonsense, Minion. When has Bernard ever been rude."

Minion looked dumbstruck. "How about every single moment of his life?"

Megamind shrugged after contemplating Minion's words. "He's never been rude to me."

"Of course not. He actually likes you." Minion would always appreciate Bernard for being his master's only other friend. He did not appreciate that Bernard was very unsociable and a jerk. He only put up with the man for Megamind's benefit.

"What did he do to you that's got you in such a fuss?"

Minion crossed his arms and said, "Roxanne."

Megamind laughed loudly. That was all Minion had to say for him to know what Bernard had done. Bernard found Minion's crush endlessly amusing. Since he also spent social time with Roxanne it made him well equipped to tease the alien fish.

"It's not funny..." Minion said quietly. His fish body sunk down towards the bottom of his dome.

Megamind immediately stopped laughing and looked at the fish. Minion was looking down at the floor and fiddling his robotic fingers. Megamind immediately felt guilty. "Of course it's not funny Minion." Megamind said this sincerely. It had been occurring to him lately that Minion was more interested in Roxanne Ritchi than he'd originally suspected.

Megamind walked up to his friend and rested his hand on Minion's arm. "I'm sorry, Minion. I didn't mean anything by it. I'm sure Bernard doesn't either." Megamind attempted to defend his human friend.

Minion patted his master on the back. He didn't blame Megamind and didn't mean for his master to feel bad. He had only been mad at Bernard for picking on him today when he was already irritated. Otherwise, he would have let the other man's comments be forgotten. Minion didn't want to create tension between his master and his master's friend.

"I'll talk to him." Megamind said suddenly. He snatched the keys to the invisible car off the desk and started to walk off.

"Wait, Sir! What about the evil plan?" Minion asked while gesturing at the half completed plan on the ceiling.

"You're more important than the evil plan Minion." Megamind answered as he got into the car.

Minion started sniffling. "That's the nicest thing I've ever heard."

* * *

Bernard was sitting on his couch watching a documentary when his balcony windows banged open. He looked over to see Megamind standing dramatically with his hands on his hips. Two brainbots were making a strobe light effect behind him.

"What are you doing?" Bernard asked. He didn't make any indication that the display was bothering him.

"Making an entrance." Megamind waved the brainbots away before closing the balcony doors. "I never like to waste an opportunity." He began walking around the couch but caught sight of Bernard sitting in only his boxers and a t-shirt. Megamind turned away and clamped his hands over his eyes. "You're not decent!"

Bernard waved the concern off. "Of course I'm decent." He glanced down. "Actually wait one second." Bernard adjusted himself so that he was tucked back in the boxers. "Now I'm decent."

Megamind turned slightly and parted a couple fingers. Bernard was smirking at him from the couch but was still half naked. He always felt weird when the other man was partially clothed. It made him uncomfortable. He decided that there was no helping it and flopped down on the opposite end of the couch.

"Minion is upset." Megamind didn't waste any time.

Bernard raised an eyebrow. "Really? He's usually tougher than that. Did I break his spirit?"

"It's not funny!" Megamind burst out while standing up. "You really hurt his feelings." He shook himself and calmed down before sitting again. "I think he has more than just a passing interest in Miss Ritchi."

"Well I already knew that."

"What do you mean?"

"Come on Kismet. You're supposed to be a genius." Bernard leaned forward a little. "Minion is in love with her."

Megamind gasped. "Impossible. She's a...you know. And he's a...you know. They're not exactly compatible." He made a sporadic hand gesture to demonstrate.

Bernard shrugged. "Love is weird like that. It turns people into drooling idiots."

"Wait a minute." Megamind began to get angry again. "If you knew that Minion loved her than why were you making fun of him so much?"

"I was just encouraging him. He can't be afraid to go for the things he wants."

Megamind was pacing angrily. "That's not good enough. You were cruel to him. You knew he had strong feelings for Miss Ritchi and you mocked him." He stopped pacing and pointed his finger at Bernard. "You apologize."

Bernard snorted and pushed the offending finger out of his face. "Not likely." He never apologized. He thought that if it was said then it was meant. So taking back the words was pointless.

"You will." Megamind protested. He wasn't sure how he could possibly make Bernard do it but he was willing to try. Megamind had bugged Minion just like Bernard but the difference to him was that he never knew that Minion actually loved her.

"I won't." Bernard said. He wouldn't apologize even for Megamind. "I treat Minion like everybody else. Just like I treat you like everybody else. He's in love and won't tell the girl. That's hilarious so I will continue to make fun of him for it."

"Can't you show just a little compassion for once." Megamind exclaimed. He didn't usually become confrontational with Bernard but he wanted his two best friends to get along.

"Nope." Bernard maintained his usual unemotional expression.

Megamind yelled in frustration, "You're infuriating!"

"I know." Bernard told him. Megamind continued to fume in silence. He wasn't going to talk to Bernard until the man apologized.

Bernard leaned forward until his nose was almost touching Megamind's cheek. The alien tried to keep himself from fidgeting. He wasn't comfortable when people got to close to him and Bernard was using it to his advantage. Megamind started to shift and his eyes darted around the room. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore. He threw his hands up in frustration and yelled, "Fine!"

Megamind stood up and attempted to look like he hadn't just lost his cool. Bernard stayed where he was and kept smirking at the alien. "I'll let it go...for now." Megamind said. Then he pointed his finger back at the other man. "But you better make it up to Minion."

Bernard considered what Megamind had just proposed. "Fair enough." He didn't have to apologize. That's all that mattered. "See you tomorrow then?"

"I'll be unleashing an evil scheme. So don't wait up."

"Give me a call from jail then." Bernard shot back.

Megamind growled in frustration. He slammed the balcony doors while he left out of spite while Bernard laughed behind him.

Next chapter: The Metroman Museum opens and Megamind tries to take his nemesis out with a deathray.


End file.
